More on the Vampire Trend

My kids were playing out in the backyard while my dad was pruning things. Then, Red comes running in.

Red: Grandpa's bleeding!
Me: Does he want a Band aid?
Red: No, he's gonna get one when he comes in.
DH: Ok, did you drink his blood?
Red: EWW! No!!
DH: Because it's perfectly OK to drink a relative's blood.
Red: I am NOT drinking his blood!
DH: Here, do you want some of mine? Red: DAD! No!!!
ME: Hey - you're gonna traumatize the kids
DH: They'll grow up traumatized anyway, it might as well be over something funny.

Boop, oblivious to the tableau she's interrupted streaks through the house: I'm not going back outside till Grandpa stops bleeding!!

Some outtakes from the Red One

It's cold in Seattle. Cooooolllld for the temperate coast huggers up here. Here are a couple of conversations I've had after school with Red to see if she was warm enough.

Me: Red, were you freezing today?
Red: No, I'm not 80% frozen?
Me: Um, do you say that because you were 80% covered up? (*GUILT* her tights had holes in them, so I had to send her in knee socks)
Red: No, I say that because I'm about 80% water, so that's how much of me could have frozen, and it didn't!

Oh.

The next day...

Me: Were you freezing today? (she is sporting a pair of new tights, so hopefully not)
Red: Well, if by freezing you mean actually *frozen*, then no. But if by freezing you mean feeling freezing, then yes, I am.

There's a reason I'm buying her the periodic table for Christmas.

Now she is playing as quietly as my girls ever play in the next room.

Boop: Hey, I'm gonna give this thing to Mystery Man because it's not girlish enough. Could you get me a girlish one for Christmas?
Red: I don't think they come girlish.
Boop: Yes, they do, they have them at Barnes and Noble. (my kids know the inventory at Barnes and Noble *very* well)
Red: Oh, ok, well, I can't tell you or it wouldn't be a surprise, so you just have to keep hoping.

At this point, Red recites "Hope is a thing with feathers" by Dickinson to her less than impressed little sister - who just wants the toy, thank you very much.