Really? Dreary?

I checked the extended forecast today and, after nearly having a heart attack because it said "high of 96 and low of 67" I realized the weather was set to Georgia. I don't know why - I'm in the temperate Emerald City. So, I entered *my* zip code and I kid you not the forecast actually said "dreary." There were pictures of grey clouds, but no rain drops, and it didn't say "partly cloudy" or "partly sunny" or "showers," and being a Seattlite I know the difference, no, it says "dreary."

That's just wrong.

I think either a smug Californian or Edgar Allen Poe is writing the forecast. And they must stop.

Overheard conversation in the garden

Red Head: I think the ladybug's going to the bathroom
Betty Boop: Where is the bathroom for ladybugs?
RH: Everywhere
BB: *embarrassed chuckle* I didn't know ladybugs went to the bathroom everywhere
RH: Well, they can't use a toilet
BB: No, they would go down the drain - hey, let's make a bathroom for ladybugs! I'll collect a lot of comfortable leaves...


Betty Boop vs. the Lotion

Betty Boop came running in with something smeared all over her face.

Me: What's on your face?
BB: Lotion!
Me: Well, c'mere so I can rub it in a little.

I start to rub and notice my hands feel a little tacky.

Me: Go get me the jar, hon, so I can see what kind of lotion it is.

She returns with jar in hand.

Me: This isn't lotion - it's for hair, and worse yet, it's texture paste.
DH: Don't make a face now or it'll totally stick like that.

Happy Birthday to the Fun Aunt!

Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to the fun aunt,
My kids think you're cool!

She, in perfect Fun Aunt fashion, will be celebrating with a cocktail party on her roof and serving drinks that don't come with their own straw attached. I will be at a pool party for 8 year olds. Such is the difference in our lives.

Happy Birthday, Sis!!

A mixed bag of updates

1) I saw Outsourced with Josh Hamilton for my impromptu movie night. It's about a guy in Seattle whose entire department gets outsourced to India. Let's just say I could relate - minus the trip to India and ensuing love story. It was fun. And there were movie treats which had a fabulous impact on my mood.

)I have SYTYCD spoilers. Oh yes I do! These help me rest easier. As I may have mentioned, I've become a little tiny bit emotionally invested in this season, and somehow, while I'm taking care of my own three little monkeys, I have the unshakeable feeling that my wings can extend to take care of my favorite dancers (ok, really just Evan) and that by some supermom power I'm able to actually make sure they do just a little bit better. That and lots of dialing. So, knowing which dance they (he) danced helps me sleep just a little better. I wouldn't say I'm completely at ease with what will be performed tonight, but I at least know how to pray.

I've never claimed to be completely mentally healthy.

) Betty Boop is now the proud owner of What Really Happened to Humpty Dumpty - and if anyone thought I was getting out of Borders without buying this book, you don't know my Boop very well. The Red Head is reading it to her right now. She's already heard it at least 5 times. And you know how some picture books are basically a poem with a line of text per picture and some are novellas? This is a novella. Great.

4) I can't decide on an ipod touch case. Any suggestions? I desperately need one.

5) The Mystery Man very compliantly went to sleep last night around 8 so I could watch my movie in peace. Then woke up at 11:30 and stayed up till 2:30. And woke up for good around 7. I was planning on today being uber productive to make up for yesterday but we aren't off to a good start.


I am not going to be productive today. I'm not even going to pretend to be productive. This is not that day. I took the kids to the mall. I got Starbucks. I had leftovers for dinner. I intend to round out the day by searching for spoilers for So You Think You Can Dance (because you know they're all dancing right now, right!) playing with all my new apps on my new ipod touch like Doodle Jump and iBonsai without any guilt whatsoever. It's just one of those days.

DH may have sensed this, because about, oh, a month ago I remember looking into whether or not someone could be offered up as an organ donor while still alive. I might have been a bit touchy that day. I don't know why. But today DH busts out with these two gems:

me: it's just leftovers today
him: it's not JUST leftovers - it's leftovers from food you made, hon!


me: I want to watch a movie tonight. I want lots of chocolate - not crap chocolate in candy coating but real chocolate and maybe something in the fruit pectin food group. And I want you to go get these things and find a super fun movie on Netflix.
him: whatever you need

Perhaps he saw me popping the Advil and realized this was the best route, or maybe he just is a great guy, I don't know, but the kids are in bed, he's out candy shopping right now, and I'm googling. YAY!

From the red head

"Remember a few weeks a go when I had the swine flu?"


"Yeah, and I had..."

"No, you did not have the swine flu."


"I promise."

Questions I've been answering for Miss Boop

about Humpety Dumpety, lately, over and over and over...

How did Humpety get up on that wall in the first place?
I didn't see a ladder?
I don't think he has any bones in his legs so he couldn't climb a ladder anyway (?!)
How could he break his legs if they have no bones?
If he had asked his mama, I think she would have told him not to climb on that wall.
Why didn't he as his mama's permission?
What does it feel like to be on a stretcher?
Where do you think they were taking him?
Where are all the egg hospitals anyway?
How do you fix an egg with no bones?

All this from the girl who would do a back flip off a wall if I weren't looking. I think she's processing the revelutionary idea of caution.

Let's do a recap, shall we?

Do I really need to say that Evan and Randi danced a fabulous jive? And how fun is the jive, anyway? They were spectacular. I think I voted enough times singlehandedly to get them through this week, but I will admit to Thursdays making me a little nervous.

Also, as part of my research for the next book I saw my very first Fred Astaire movie last night. This seems a little crazy, for as much as I love old movies, to have never seen Fred Astaire. My philosophy was always that in a world where Cary Grant movies exist, why would I watch something else?

I can say now I think the best thing about Fred Astaire was Ginger Rogers. And Ginger's wardrobe. I really, really don't get him. BUT, I saw Gene Kelly and Judy Garland this afternoon (the Mystery Man was less than thrilled - he kept grabbing the Tivo and trying to get Cat Deely on the screen - he prefers blondes) and I can say that I adore Gene Kelly. So, we're gonna make the research less painful and pull up Singin' in the Rain next. Mystery Man will just have to learn to love Debbie Reynolds.

I knew I was better than that!

My Google skillz are in tact everyone, don't fear. Even I doubted myself for a moment. I have spoilers. YES!!!!

Lamplight Pitch

Here's the pitch, folks!

Oliver's about to have the best summer of his life. He’s finished with high school, working as a video game tester, and living in downtown Seattle with his best friend, Max. Together they’re designing a video game that will help them get into an elite gaming academy in Seattle. If they’re accepted, they figure they get to spend the rest of their lives playing video games.

But Oliver makes the dual mistake of using his beautiful neighbor, Lily, as a model for his kick-ass cyber heroine and then falling in love with her. When she goes missing, he becomes the number one suspect in her disappearance. But Oliver doesn’t sit back and lose himself in a game of Halo. Instead he asks himself, “If this were a video game, what would I do?”

He sets out to discover if she’s dead or alive. When he finds her, he discovers that real women are far more dangerous than virtual ones, and as he tries to protect her from a murderer, she continues with her own, less altruistic plans. Soon Oliver’s focus changes from saving her life, to saving his.

Recap post

1) The Red Head has been miraculously free of coughing and head colds since I took her off dairy. YAY! She still won't eat her cheerios with goat milk, or soy for that matter, but we're finding new things to eat and she's healthy for once in a very long time. I'm also not picking up kleenex from random places all over the house and car. It's a win win.

2) I keep trying to trick myself into thinking that maybe So You Think You Can Dance might be on tonight - then checking the Fox website to see if they've suddenly changed their programming, but it remains on tomorrow. So sad. Also, all those people at SYTYCD should work for the CIA, because I think I'm pretty good at finding things out with my Google Fu, but no one - NO ONE - is leaking anything at all - not who made it to Vegas week for Season 6 (yes, Ryan already tried out in LA - but that's all I know), not which choreographers are working on the show this week - not what Wade Robson was smoking last week - nothing. I just Have. To. Wait.

3) I had a lightening bolt experience where the structure and characters for my next book suddenly all came together. Now I have people, I have a place and time, some conflict - it's gonna be great. But I'm trying not to let it take over my imagination because I still have 31,000 words to write on Lamplight.

4) Speaking of Lamplight - I'll be posting the hook soon in celebration of making it halfway.

Now I have to go stop the Mystery Man from carting his chocolate milk around on his truck. It just doesn't look stable...

The Brother's K

After an entire season of feeling mostly ambivalent about American Idol (with a brief period of intense voting for The Mystery Man's favorite blonde), I'm now emotionally invested in So, You Think You Can Dance. Great. As if I didn't have enough stress in my life. My dentist thinks my teeth might be missing an entire third of their length from clenching, and NOW I have to worry about who gets kicked off week after week. AND I have to know that Ryan is auditioning RIGHT NOW for season 6 and I'll have no way of knowing if he makes it for weeks and weeks and weeks.

I'm not sure I can take it. It's a good thing I have naturally low blood pressure.

The backstory, is last season's tragedy of leaving Evan Kazprzak behind in Vegas week. The show has redeemed itself by putting him in the top 20 this time around, but not before introducing us to his brother, who is every bit as good as he is, if not better because now we know he choreographs it all, and then we saw all the tears and cheers and brotherly support and the "Ryan could use some good news" and I give! Ok, enough already! I'm a fan!

The songs, the style, the affection, the throwback to an era of respect and diligence and George Baily and Frank Capra is everything I love in art and story and who would have thought you'd find it in reality tv, too.

Which is why I'm embedding my favorite video. So you'll get it, too. I know, you're shocked. I'm not typically one to emebed videos. Not even book trailers. I, who own a flip, have not even made my own book trailer. I almost never click on videos myself, so I understand your temptation to just assume that it's some cute dance and move on. But don't. Please. Click play. You won't be sorry.

Halfway, Baby!

Yes, I did it! I'm halfway through Lamplight. WOO HOO!!! Tomorrow I may post the hook for you all, and maybe an excerpt, in celebration. It only took me a year and a half. I know, pathetic, but I did have a child in the middle there, and that comes with one or two things to do. I'm hoping the second half flies by.

Now, a few things I need to cover:

1) Ally Carter has been on a book tour and I got my copy of Don't Judge A Girl By Her Cover signed by her tonight. I promise I let all the 12 year olds go first! I've been reading her blog for the last 3 years or so - she was one of the first writer blogs I started reading - I found her through Kristen Nelson (and I know for certain that Kristen's is the second pub blog I ever read, right after the inimitable Miss Snark). Ally's fabulous, and I love my book!

2)Crash Test Dummies - really Wade Robson? After you gave us the fox number - and I don't mean fox trot, people, I mean foxes nuzzling each other - now we have crash test dummies. Can we please see all Bollywood and preferably all Evan K doing the dancing. Thank you. Ok, a Broadway number and the occasional quickstep is fine too, so long as Evan dances all of it.

3)Mystery Man loves So You Think You Can Dance. I think he's got a crush on Cat. He certainly loves a lanky blonde. He claps, he points at the screen, he points at the Tivo remote when I pause it because Betty Boop found a spider on her pillow, as if to say 'turn it back on, already, she'll live!' I asked DH and he said he'll totally support him if he plans a career in dance. I wonder how he feels about Hula?

I warned him

that I'd be blogging this - so no feeling sorry for him or calling foul. That's what you get when you say things like:

I hope you won't take offense at this, but you're really still doing basic moves. I like to think I've transcended something now that I stay away from the peas completely.

This was in reference to... yes, Plants vs. Zombies.

Can I pick 'em, or what?!

Progressive Rummy Night

We played cards with the Red Head tonight after Boop and Mystery Man went to bed. She kept up a running dialogue with her cards through all 12 hands of progressive rummy. I really can't even describe the speed of her speech. She was offering jobs to some of them if they'd come back on hands when she could use their services. She was making puns. She was congratulating her wild cards.

And through it all, I was winning. Not terribly graciously, either, because my philosophy is to talk smack while you can, because you never know when you'll lose the lead.

And I did, lose the lead, right at the end, to DH.

At which point I said, "Yes, but I was ahead for longer than anyone!"

DH replied, "It's really who has the lead at the end, that counts."

I suppose if you want to get technical, that's true. But I'm sure I had more fun.

The hot, er cool, er medium tub

Things for which I am grateful: Clouds.

That pretty much tops the list today - wind being a close second. Yes, the temperature finally dropped, so much so that standing outside in front of the hot tub (which we had turned down to 90) to watch the girls "swim" I needed a jacket. And immediately thought, "I wish it were warmer" before catching myself. NO I DON'T!!

Here is a snippet of the conversation in the hot tub tonight.

Me: How are you enjoying the 'cool tub'
Red: I really think it's a medium tub. (she tends to be exact about things, and that may be the biggest understatement I've ever made)
Betty Boop: It's a warm tub!
Red: No, I really think it's a medium tub - not too warm, not too cool.
Betty Boop: That's what I said.
Red: No it isn't. You said it was a warm tub.
Betty Boop: But 'warm tub' is Spanish for 'medium tub'

Perhaps too much Dora and Handy Manny - or not enough - I can't really tell.

Breakfast adventures

The Red Head is grumbling over her Cheerios with rice milk. Betty Boop is arguing with her cinnamon toast (a snippet: "It's not nice to repeat everything. It's not nice to repeat everything! Hey, toast!") And the Mystery Man is removing his diaper, flinging it in the trash and running around the house in hysterical laughter while we try to catch him.

And it's supposed to be 87 degrees today. Let's all remember that people in Seattle do not have air conditioning. My sanity is already feeling the assault.

On the bright side, my gem of a DH brought me a (sugar free) vanilla latte this morning before I was even fully conscious. He probably feared for his children's safety when he saw my zombie-like expression.

Good ol' Gluten Free

The hula went off beautifully, I'm sure you're all dying to know. I think I just like typing 'hula' over and over. (And yes, Miss Boop needs this doll!) The big performance is in July and our teacher handed me fabric and told me where to get the patterns to make the dresses. You may still be able to hear my laughter echoing throughout the recesses of the earth. Then she mentioned she knew a seamstress... done.

In other news, I have flirted with a gluten free diet in the past, then something came along known as the Mystery Man Incubation Period and we cited irreconcilable differences. Basically, I got pregnant and could only keep down Hostess Twinkies and Ding Dongs. That might be why I have a few pounds left to lose. I just got the word yesterday that I absolutely have celiac disease and "gluten is poison" were my doctor's words. Ugh.

So, thank goodness for all the fabulous GF blogs out there - actually dairy free, too, since I have to take my 8 year old off dairy. I made some chicken tenders coated in crushed tortilla chips and coconut tonight with a spicy marmalade dipping sauce that were yummy, so maybe I'll be able to pull this off. I'm just hoping it doesn't affect my word count!