More on the Vampire Trend

My kids were playing out in the backyard while my dad was pruning things. Then, Red comes running in.

Red: Grandpa's bleeding!
Me: Does he want a Band aid?
Red: No, he's gonna get one when he comes in.
DH: Ok, did you drink his blood?
Red: EWW! No!!
DH: Because it's perfectly OK to drink a relative's blood.
Red: I am NOT drinking his blood!
DH: Here, do you want some of mine? Red: DAD! No!!!
ME: Hey - you're gonna traumatize the kids
DH: They'll grow up traumatized anyway, it might as well be over something funny.

Boop, oblivious to the tableau she's interrupted streaks through the house: I'm not going back outside till Grandpa stops bleeding!!

I am up way too late

But while I'm up - just a note that my kids have been making me play Brad Paisley's "Penguin, James Penguin" over and over and over again. Someone really needs to turn it into a claymation special, because it's fabulous. It's about how Santa keeps tabs on all the kids with his secret agent penguin.

But, there's this line, "He's got satellite uplinks in his cufflinks, he knows everything you do."

And Red asks, "What are cufflinks?"

And so I explain... then ask, "But you're fine with 'satelite uplinks?'"

She says, "Yeah, I assume that has to do with the GPS."

So, that's what we've got folks, a generation for whom cufflinks are more foreign than satellites.

Some outtakes from the Red One

It's cold in Seattle. Cooooolllld for the temperate coast huggers up here. Here are a couple of conversations I've had after school with Red to see if she was warm enough.

Me: Red, were you freezing today?
Red: No, I'm not 80% frozen?
Me: Um, do you say that because you were 80% covered up? (*GUILT* her tights had holes in them, so I had to send her in knee socks)
Red: No, I say that because I'm about 80% water, so that's how much of me could have frozen, and it didn't!

Oh.

The next day...

Me: Were you freezing today? (she is sporting a pair of new tights, so hopefully not)
Red: Well, if by freezing you mean actually *frozen*, then no. But if by freezing you mean feeling freezing, then yes, I am.

There's a reason I'm buying her the periodic table for Christmas.

Now she is playing as quietly as my girls ever play in the next room.

Boop: Hey, I'm gonna give this thing to Mystery Man because it's not girlish enough. Could you get me a girlish one for Christmas?
Red: I don't think they come girlish.
Boop: Yes, they do, they have them at Barnes and Noble. (my kids know the inventory at Barnes and Noble *very* well)
Red: Oh, ok, well, I can't tell you or it wouldn't be a surprise, so you just have to keep hoping.

At this point, Red recites "Hope is a thing with feathers" by Dickinson to her less than impressed little sister - who just wants the toy, thank you very much.

Yes, Ma'am!

I'm working on getting Boop to respond with, "Yes, ma'am."

I'm not southern, but I like that it conveys one has heard and (hopefully) understood what has been asked of them, and will comply. This is especially important in Boop. Also, the school my kids go to requires it and we'd better start soon with this one. Plus, if she ever wants to try out for the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders, she's gonna have to know how to say it, if "Making the Team" is any indication! OK, so that point's less important.

But, in classic Boop fashion... she's turned it on me. I can hear her singing from the other room at the top of her lungs:

"Yes, Ma'am" is a good thing to say!
"Yes, Ma'am" is gooooood!
"Do you want a poodle?" "Yes, ma'am!"

*sigh*