Lessons Learned


No, not about writing. Though I might be able to reach and come up with some corollary, this is a concrete, practical sort of post about glitter. Because you've all been needing one, right?

Lesson 1) Spilling glitter on a recently mopped floor (Friday) while frustrating, is actually much better than spilling glitter on a yet to be mopped floor (Monday)

Lesson 2) If you (or one of your minions) spills glitter on a sticky floor, the glitter will, not surprisingly, stick to the sticky places.

Lesson 3) If you scrub at these sticky places, you will think you are scrubbing the glitter off, but what you are really doing is scrubbing the sticky stuff off while redistributing the glitter elsewhere on the floor.

Lesson 4) Glitter has excellent survival skills.

Lesson 5) No matter how big the pile, and how much you think it would it would be so much faster to sweep up the pile rather than carry bit by bit of it to the garbage can in wet paper towels... DO NOT REACH FOR THE BROOM. Brooms get up a lot of glitter, but just like that movie where the bad guy's been shot so the hero relaxes and you're shouting "NO, don't put down the gun!" because you can see the bad guy's hand reaching ever so slowly up... glitter sticks to the broom. And will redistribute itself around the kitchen floor (see Lesson number 4).

Lesson 6) If you think you've thrown away all the glitter, check again, and again, and in the bottoms of the art bin, because maybe you just threw away an empty container and it's all hiding at the bottom of the bin waiting for some rushed child to stuff it into a cupboard where it will without a doubt fall on your feet as soon as you open the cupboard.

Lesson 7) Gold glitter actually looks really cool going down a sink because the gold kind of floats on top of the water.

I hope I've helped someone.

2 comments:

Christine Danek said...

This is hilarious. I have had glitter issues in the past. I wish I knew this before the glitter spilled.
Thanks.

September 27, 2010 at 4:41 PM
Lily Cate said...

Oh, you're done for.
Glitter cannot be defeated with mortal weapons.

October 19, 2010 at 4:28 PM

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